Drama Llamas

It's something that not everyone wants to admit, but almost everyone enjoys a good bit of drama now and then.  Who doesn't like having their boring 9-5 day spiced up with a little mudslinging, as long as none of the mud lands on them?

I'm no different.  I can admit that.  I enjoy a good meltdown, although I almost never partake in them.

Come on, they're fun, right?  Tempers flare, rash words get said that really shouldn't have been said and make the onlookers go all:

It's true.  We all do it.  Until we're in the middle of it.  It's been a long time since I was at the heart of a controversy, and never since becoming an author and putting my work out for others to read and possibly revile.

But drama is the one thing you're never going to be able to completely avoid if you plan on having a public profile.  The question is how are you going to handle yourself when the shitstorm is suddenly revolving around you.

See that "hole" in the middle there?  That's the eye of the storm, the calm center.  All around it, chaos is raging, but right there?  Right there things are serene, peaceful in the midst of the turmoil.

That's my lesson of the day, if you're interested.  After having seen so many shitstorms exploding all over GoodReads and Amazon's forums, after witnessing author meltdowns ranging from spectacular to nuclear to just kinda sad, I just want to urge you to be more like the eye of the storm.

I know it's harder when you're in the middle of it.  People are saying things.  Mean things.  They're attacking you and your precious creation, the one you sweated bullets to bring into being.  And it hurts.

We do, though.  And the absolute only thing to do when controversy starts getting going is to stay above it.  Oh, and maybe, just maybe, don't start it yourself.  

Obey the purple striped lady with the freakishly huge hand and don't start shit.  Seriously, people, don't complain that you're not getting enough good reviews on your books, don't call them names, don't rant about how ungrateful they are.

Stay humble.  Stay professional.  Appreciate your readers.  And leave the drama llamas out in the pasture, okay?

Because seriously, that one there looks like she will cut a bitch.